more glorious than hookers and blow

Giro pVAM analysis through Stage 15

Mon, 20 May 2013 14:53:00 -0700

with about as many

climb

abandons

pickens are slim

fer stuff to analyze

but here goes

first up the climbs

stg 14 does away with any intermezo n goes straight

Jafferau

uh punchy little helion uva 9.2% 654 vert m climb topping at

1908 meters altitude

good fer uh pVAM uv 1689 m/hour

while stg 15

the GC pianos the Cenis out uv relevance

before going

Telegraphe

7.16% 848 vert m climb at 1566 meter

pVAM 1596 m/hour

quick eat uh gel

n right back at it on

the into thin air

Galibier

6.52% 862 vert m reaching the pantani monument

at 2295 meters altitude

pVAM 1495 m/h

or stg 15 could be rightly considered

as one monster

TeleGalibier

6.8% 1710 vert m rising again to the 2295 meters uv altitude

with a bit uva a downhil breather

half way up

pVAM 1455 m/h

recalling fer uh bit that

high pVAMs mean steep short low altitude

low pVAM mean less steep longer higher altitude

…

right then

stage set

stg 14 had Santambrogio n Nibali going 1-2

with a positive residual of 0.64%

or just under 1 percent faster than the predicted VAM

they were followed by

Uran at -1.5% or 1.5% slower than pVAM

Cadel at with a similar -1.7%

with only Scarponi getting truly dropped

at -6%

with nibali finally going faster

than the predicted VAM

n favorites coming in 1s and 2s

this climb is the first real look at their

flat out climbing

rather than tactical cat n mouse

n overall

its

(yawn big stretch)

…

the bigger question is what to make of stg 15

at first pass

over the telegraphe

the maglia rosa group put in a modest

-6%

while Gesink took off at a decent

-3.74%

after a short downhill

Gesink detonated on the Galibier

while the the maglia rosa

tempoed it in at

-6.25%

which might be plausible based on a general shit weather cease fire

that the two climbs ride more like one

with a little breather

and the maglia rosa group

put in a 0.01% or an actual performance

in line with the predicted

pushing Gesinks attack well into the unsustainable range

based on the select but not fully decimated group that went 0.01

it looks like more like the climb rides more like

Tele-Galibier*

“Tele-Galibier”

but with the presence of Scarponi

it would be awful generous to call it one climb

so yes interlaced

but still clearly separate for purposes uv

the pVAM model
…

now

in GC overal terms

what we’re left with is

whether by

abandons

weather

cleaner racers

or general grabassery

uh slow GT

notice that almost all the residuals

are negative

bars go down

slower than predicted

however yuh wanna think uv it

realy only Nibali and Santambrogio have gone

at GT winning pace

only on stage 14

Uran had one decent day on stg 10

that’s it

Evans

is still in the hunt

without putting in any GT winning performance

Scarponi

is hangin top 5

by default alone

which leaves us agreein

with the riders on one thing

lets hope this thing heats up uh bit

in the spirit uv transparency to the 404 firecrest guy that got dropped

Sat, 18 May 2013 22:38:00 -0700

thissus the sagital plane uv docs knee (lookin from the side)

the front of the knee to the left back to the right

in the lower bone

the tibia

on the back uv it you can see an area about 1.5 cm

surrounded by brighter white which radiates out

that is swelling

in the bone

the reason fer the swelling

is a bit more obvious here

where you can see a chunk

that’s cracked n pushed down uh touch

here’s the view from the back uv the knee

again see the ring uv white

in the lower bone

over on the left side of the picture

radiating out

that’s the swelling

in the bone

n here’s

the chunk cracked off

pushed uh bit down

admittedly

it’s not uh big fracture

but

certainly still qualifies

as uh broken leg

concerning unough to were

the radiologist calls onna Saturday

is like…”dude ehh”

docs like “RIGHT.”

thissus

slightly greater

than

marginal losses

here’s the take home

if you roll on

700cc carbon

that’s worth more than docs car

a car he loves by the way

don’t

get

dropped

by the gimp with uh broken leg

So Rafal Majka says, "(...) I have a feeling that my condition is still improving." Is that even possible in a GT?

Sat, 18 May 2013 21:40:50 -0700

if you come in medium rare then at first sure why not

cc @vaughters

Sat, 18 May 2013 09:03:06 -0700

cc @vaughters

red cow

Thu, 16 May 2013 09:29:56 -0700

swiss fed corruption

only plausible explanation

for backing McQuaid

preempting

Irish EGM

referrendum

today

all

races are lost

"If you’re conservative and believe that 10 per cent are doping, four out of every five..."

Wed, 15 May 2013 22:31:44 -0700

““If you’re conservative and believe that 10 per cent are doping, four out of every five athletes who are doping are not getting picked up by these tests,” Pound said in the interview. “Why is that?””

- http://www.vancouversun.com/touch/story.html?id=8389291

link coutesy of @Clean_Protocol

with cycling suggested as a sport needing “tough love”

and dropped from the Olympics

it don’t sound like

Pounds buys into the 2008

and the great cease fire

now pound dont exactly get the same love as

Ashy

something about Floyd n defiling virgins

n

Floyd being uh guy we like

but

truth is

if he’s speakin truth

we probably gotta listen

the message here

to simplify

is people

people are the problem

impotizing

otherwise decent tests

…

red cow is comming up in 1 month

Ireland’s chance

to do fer the rest uv the world

what the rest uv the world

shoulda long since done fer itself

;

dump Mcquaid

but even if its done

aside from Vaughters inna already forgotten tweet

noone uv worth

is thrown their tecate tab in the hat

that’s

uh failing

after speakin with fer bowers at amssm

and

following with an email

no offer fer help has been responded to

that’s uh failing

Horner is still not band

santambrogio is still in the giro

basso never got a second ban

Armstrong raced in 2010

dekker raced for lotto

danny van haute DSes fer Jelly Belly n Brad has to be grateful fer just uh spot on the team

mancebo races fer Frankie Andreau fer fuggs sake

these are all failings

the new GT mold

is impossibly emaciated guys

still putting out watts

in the third week

that’s uh failing

my ass n Teague

not having Clean Protocol further along

that’s a failing

the creep uv complacency

opening the door

fer any positive that did come

in 2008

realy

realy

realy

need

to not let that become a failing

"@JMBeaushrimp: @veloclinic @mewmewmew13 Same cat, different questions. Do you have ice? Do you have..."

Wed, 15 May 2013 21:08:03 -0700

“@JMBeaushrimp: @veloclinic @mewmewmew13 Same cat, different questions. Do you have ice? Do you have Tecate? If not, blame that fucking cat…”

- sumtimes the flock

gets it

the Tecate uncertainty principle

Wed, 15 May 2013 20:36:09 -0700

yuh can’t be at the store

know exactly how many Tecate are left in yer home fridge

at the same time

Giro Stage 10 pVAM analysis n prognostication

Wed, 15 May 2013 11:53:00 -0700

Using the latest version of Scott’s pVAM equation:

pVAM = 2912.14 + 426.293 ln(gradient) – 0.0711 Vclimb – 0.0836 Altitude

http://www.cyclismas.com/2013/05/what-to-expect-from-the-giro-favourites-predicting-climbing-performances/

(note the equation used in this analysis calculates a pVAM from the historical data set uv all available data, while in the link above Scott uses a regression specific to Nibali, Wiggins, and Hesjedal.)

we take a deeper look

to see just what the hell is goin on in this Giro

first up the climbs

whats immediately apparent is

the Lanza n the Montasio

aint the same animal

while finishing at a similar altitude uv 1550 meters

the true climb uv the Lanza climbs is steeper 9.5% gradient

8% fer the Montasio

but

shorter at 581 m for the Lanza

859 m for the Montasio

if ridden flat out

the pVAM for the shorter steeper Lanza works out to

1738 meters/hour

which is higher than predicted for

the longer less steep Montasio pVAM

1652 meters/hour

in their collective show uv force

Sky hit the front ticking off an actual VAM (aVAM) uv

1611 meters / hours

shedding everyone

except fer everyone who mattered

in contrast

on the Montasio

Uran went up the road at an actual VAM of 1649 meters/hour

with the remainder of the favorites littering the climb behind him

looking at the residuals

the difference between the pVAM and aVAM

it becomes clear that the race played to Nibali’s strengths

while Sky’s tactics start to look flat bewildering

what we see on the finishing climb residuals

is that only Uran even came close to hitting the predicted

despite his atttack that utltimately shattered the group

what this means is that the climb was not

started

ridden

and

finished

at threshold

in 2012 TDF le train brad fashion

but instead

ridden like a climber climb

with a slow start (holding the overal aVAM down)

followed by a hard acceleration

above threshold

letting the punchier Nibali

drop

Brad

and the other pure diesels

despite the total climb being ridden

below uh pace that an on form Brad

had been able to sustain in previous performances

http://www.cyclismas.com/2013/05/what-to-expect-from-the-giro-favourites-predicting-climbing-performances/recent-performances-of-giro-contenders/

and

the SKY effort on the Lanza

impressive to the camera

but at 8% off uv a pVAM pace

unlikley to have done much damage

to anyone able to ride within 4% uv pVAM

(which was everybody except hesjedal)

…

therefore the prognostication

is unless SKY resurrects

le train Brad

and takes the intermediate climbs at 4% uv pVAM

and the finishing climbs within

2% uv pVAM

Brad will get attacked and dropped

in the final finishing climb kilometers

like he did in stage 10

All in all, we're all just Brads in the Wall. - Pink Floyd Landis

Tue, 14 May 2013 12:33:43 -0700

"@albertocelani: Uran:”Focused team,we planned an attack with Henao,regularly riding.No plan..."

Tue, 14 May 2013 08:50:36 -0700

“@albertocelani: Uran:”Focused team,we planned an attack with Henao,regularly riding.No plan changed,Wiggo is fine” #giro #cycling”

-

interview with brads inner chimp

Mon, 13 May 2013 23:58:00 -0700

what was it like ?

like prison

like prison ?

like prison, like bein trapped inna box realy,

like brads brain was this little box,

and you had geert and brailsford just stuffing you right back in,

any time you felt like going out for a bit,

but you did get out, how does that feel?

it’s exhilarating realy, bein trapped in brad you don’t have the chance to see that whole worlds not completely mental

mental ?

oh yeah absolutely

tell us , what happens now ?

well you don’t get him off the mountain do you,

he’ll be just stuck up there,

the commisionaire’ll just time cut him most likely

then he can ride down with the caravan

and then ?

then he won’t be able to show his face will he

might even be difficult to look himself in the mirror

this is quite uh change from last year ?

oh yeah

last year was all yeah

and yeah

http://youtu.be/CrtOdfrOoPU

and this year was supposed to be

but ended up more

more ?

yeah well yeah

which turned out to be ?

yeah yeah definitely cart before the horse

so what does brad gotta do?

brads gotta just except brad for what brad is innit

did you tell him that ?

yeah

n how did that go ?

(redacted pic)

so what’s next fer the chimp, anything exciting?

yeah yeah hang out with froome yeah

i advocate against unpaid work, so uh nevermind then

Mon, 13 May 2013 22:54:11 -0700

or yuh co… eh fuggit

FOUND !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! n lookit the little guy go

Mon, 13 May 2013 22:51:00 -0700

FOUND !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! n lookit the little guy go

inner chimp looks like this

Sun, 12 May 2013 23:04:25 -0700

but smaller

so it kin fit in brads head

if found please tweet Fran millar

inner chimp with blue armband

Sun, 12 May 2013 23:00:10 -0700

responds to Ralph

please help find him

http://www.teamsky.com/profile/0,27291,17543_6638147,00.html

important ! SKY inner chimp gone missing !

Sun, 12 May 2013 22:52:59 -0700

http://www.teamsky.com/profile/0,27291,17543_6638147,00.html

so when'd SKY pull the "inner chimp" off the website ?

Sun, 12 May 2013 22:49:48 -0700

http://www.teamsky.com/profile/0,27291,17543_6638147,00.html

“The rail-thin Phonak rider started the Vuelta’s...

Sun, 12 May 2013 22:37:00 -0700

“The rail-thin Phonak rider started the Vuelta’s penultimate stage second at 1:13 back, but he trimmed Heras’s lead by 30 seconds after putting down a vicious acceleration with 2km to go that the defending champion couldn’t answer.”

giro rest day eve recap

Sun, 12 May 2013 22:16:28 -0700

between UCI_Overlord

David Walsh

it’d be nice if the story tellers

took uh break from becoming the story

cuz were the shit does that leave the little guy

or girl

with the self portrait blog

celebrity

by proxy

proximity

ferish

more accurately

uv having even fer the time it took

yer best friend

to screw up the pic

shared space

Walsh dares the uncouth

his own little gutter mouth trolls

make his day

n earn

an unfollow

fortunatley

fer dowsett

people will remember

his breakthrough win

longer than

SkyMance 2013

which has all the markings uv

as @deandobbs pointed out

uh Stockholm syndrome

were the kidnapped

fall fer their captor

if only that were truer

than

kimmage’s observation

that Walsh is like uh puppy

jus give him a stick

and he’ll just keep running with it